We pulled into Amicalola Falls State Park late Sunday afternoon, after the crowds had dispersed and after stopping at a convenience store to grab energy snacks for our hike. I purchased the tasty peanut butter crackers and the delightful cheese crackers.I never miss an opportunity for cheese. I especially love the cheddar and the Charo.
I handed the gate attendant three dollars to enter the park and noted the "Do Not Feed the Bears" sign. I thought that meant the attendant who wore a Smokey hat, so I did not feed him. I gave him an expired Free Dinner coupon, not feeding him something heart-cloggy in a noisy restaurant.
Another good deed accomplished and "a good day to you, my good man and public servant in stereotypical garb," I drove on and we soon embarked on our merry, huffy, puffy, sweaty, sulky, sucky bipedal way up the steepy, thickly forested hiking trail.
Clutching earth and pulling our bodies to the summit, I gasped, "I ... don't hear ... theme from Rocky," and we started the long roll back down to the parking lot.
About halfway, I snowballed to a bonk into an oak tree and Donna and her mom were embraced by a gigantic granite boulder.
"Ooo, we should have a never-ending picnic here," Donna said, unfolding a plaid table cloth from which she produced a vase filled with daffodils.
My mother-in-law did some expert hand modeling and pointing, which, I must admit, did enhance the attractiveness of the flowers.
"Nope, let's go. I'm a guy. I've got power tools to ignore and probably no serious girly mags to contend with," I said lovingly, tossing the ladies a pack of the crackers. I tore into my cheese yummies with the picture of Chester Cheetos on the label.
"He's my favorite chef, you know," I winked at an opossum.
We stumbled fast down the incline, enjoying our treats. I tore deeper into my cellophane wrapper, when Donna stopped suddenly and made a quiet noise of grave concern.
What follows is our actual conversation.
"What is it?" I whispered.
"I heard rustling," she said.
I held up my crackers for her to see. "That was me."
"Thank goodness," she said. "I thought it was a bear and it smelled the food. We've got peanut butter."
"No," I corrected, "YOU'VE got peanut butter."
