Here's the series of real emails I sent on the touching medical breakthrough, human noggin transplants, as seen in "The Thing With Two Heads" (1972).
05/20/08
"I'm sorry. I misspoke. I meant to say 'that Academy award-winning fake Ray Milland head really can act!' My apologies for any inconvenience."
05/20/08
"Actually, what I really meant to say was: 'that fake Academy award-winner Ray Milland head really can act!' I meant no disrespect to the members of the Academy, Price-Waterhouse, or the original issue head of Rosey Grier. Here, let me validate your parking."
05/20/08
"No, wait a minute, what I really meant to say was: 'that Academy award winner Ray Milland's fake head really can act!'
That's it. That's exactly what I meant to say. This English language thing is tricky. I've ordered in more ampersands. Those should help and the frequent use of the words 'Lilt No Drip Foam Home Permanent with extra body, extra wavy luxuriousness and lustre.' Try some today."
Tylenol, please.
And a fake one for the phantasma of Mr. Milland.
More on The Thing: "Head Over Squeals"
