Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Lucille Ball Cartoon: 'My Favorite Husband: George's Christmas Present' (1949, 2010)

Lucille Ball and Richard Denning performing an...Lucille Ball, Richard Denning via Wikipedia

I find myself inside a holiday miracle!

A day or so before Christmas, by happenstance, I listened to a previously unheard-by-me episode of "My Favorite Husband," the radio sitcom starring Lucille Ball. This series, of course, was the basis for TV's "I Love Lucy." The show I heard, "George's Christmas Present," first aired across America on Dec. 16, 1949.

Jump ahead to this afternoon, and, by happenstance, I discovered the very same episode has been recently Flash animated by Wayne Wilson, nicely, too. What are the chances of that occurring?

Here is the animation in three parts with co-star Richard Denning, plus Eleanor Audley and personal favorite Frank Nelson.

I'd sure like to see more of these, Miracle Central.



"My Favorite Husband: 1949 Christmas Show, Part 1" via YouTube



"My Favorite Husband: 1949 Christmas Show, Part 2" via YouTube



"My Favorite Husband: 1949 Christmas Show, Part 3" via YouTube

Thanks to Yowp.

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Mikellaneous

Follow Mike on Twitter
My Recent Confessions and Observations on Twitter:

Watching: MR. MAGOO'S CHRISTMAS CAROL CHANNING.

People look at you like you're crazy if you wear a Pilgrim hat. I have no idea why. I cut the proper amount of leg holes in it....

Watching: WE WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS ELSEWHERE.

Item: "Passengers Rage at New Naked Scanners, Patdowns." Hey, get over it. I can't be too safe in my piggyback rides business.

Watching: DECK THE HALL & OATES.

Reimagining Rodney Dangerfield: "If it weren't for the TSA, I'd have no sex life at all."

Watching: DANCE OF THE SUGAR PLUM BIEBERS.

Going to the county dump for a festive Christmas dumpster toss! Fa la la la la... Pray there is no mistletoe...

Watching: PRANCER'S "DON'T ASK, DON'T TELL" POINSETTIA PARTY.

Drat. I missed being named PEOPLE's "Sexiest Man Alive." But I am MISCREANT WEEKLY's "Schlub With a Pulse." So, there, I haven't lost it....

Watching: SANTA'S LAPLAND.

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Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Big Weekend

Big weekend, I noticed a ginormous increase in the use of the word "ginormous." 



Oh. And something about Christmas.

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

O Holy Night

I've been blessed with the honor and joy that comes in life from observing two infant godsons mature into fine young men, making their marks on the world. On this Christmas Day, Dan is far away in Afghanistan assisting the brave American troops, while Jeremy is home with his family. Our love and pride and prayers are with them both.

Jeremy has also been known to putter with a piano. Ha! That makes me laugh!

Here is his latest musical release.


Jeremy West: "O Holy Night" via YouTube


Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Big Weekend

Friday
Me and the missus and the cummerbund attended the theater, "A Tuna Christmas."

Favorite quote: "I've seen better hair on anchovies."

Afterward, looked in window at Fantastic Swams.

Saturday
Survived wife-inflicted Outlet Mall. My only outlet necessitated an hour-long slog through Kirkland's. I manned sniveling babied up, faced debilitating boredom, puzzlingly pleased female mindset, and inhaled oppressive candle-scented oxygen to the point of phantasms.

Let out, mauled.

Sunday
Watched the first episode of National Geographic's "Great Migrations." So violent and disturbing, I great migrated myself off the couch and returned the DVDs to the store unwatched.

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Off the Wall

Saving Facebook: My Confessions: 

On the Holidays

Neighbor Sally
Hope Santa is good to you. Love the Christmas lights. Thanks for the Christmas spirit you exude.

Mike
I exude Christmas spirit? You mean the rash that looks like holly berries?

On Serious Sleeping

Flannel sheets are the greatest invention ever! I wasted half my life without them. Everyone kept a secret from Mikey. ... *snif*

On Cold Weather

Friend Bill Up North
Feet in the microwave to thaw out? Not recommended.

Mike
I like to feet in the soup pot so everyone else can enjoy it, too!

On Halloween Preparations

Mike
Bought the trick-or-treat candy today & finished it off within the hour. I am slowing in my old age. Back to the store tomorrow. Mmmm...

Brother Bob
There is a lesson somewhere in that. You either bought too early or...not enough.

Mike
The lesson, dear Bob, is I do it for the children.

Friend Frank Thompson
Well, I'm on Atkins so we're not buying Halloween candy. I'll be giving the kids giblets.

On Invasive Airport Security Searches

Mike
In the interest of fairness, since I don't fly, for the next 10 minutes only: Touch my junk!

Mike, later
Closed. No takers. You're no fun. My junk is junk....

Friend Cathy
Charlie doesn't let me touch nobody's junk....sorry.

I guess it's just a silly marital rule he has......

Mike
I guess. Sheesh...

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Meanwhile...



Morty's napping in the Christmas tree. Where else?

What follows could double for his surveillance video....


Simon's Cat in "Santa Claws" via YouTube

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Big Weekend


Friday

Quiet evening at home with no cat on fire.

Saturday

Pussy Inferno (See: Fire That Cat!)

Sunday

Deep freeze with no cat on fire.

Snowbound. Cabin fever. Hell. No naners.


Photo: Our place on the right. Thanks to Sally Smelcer.

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Fire That Cat!

This afternoon, I held our youngest cat, Melvin, against my chest for a five-minute hug and massage, standing next to the window so he could look outside. This scenario is a ritual we do everyday. All was calm and I put him down and walked across the room, leaving the boy behind.

CandleImage via Wikipedia
I went to the kitchen counter to recharge the cellphone, an arm's length from a three-inch aromatic candle flickering on the stovetop. No sooner had I picked up the device, Melvin jumped from the floor onto the stove. I was distracted, so I didn't notice him at first, until something caught my eye and nose.

I swirled my head to the left to see Melvin's tail, to my huge horror, immersed in an orb of fire! His fluffy tail was directly over the candle flame, burning!

Casually, Melvin watched me drop the phone and the breakage.

I yelped, "MELVIN!!"

The shout startled him. He leaped to the floor and scurried away.

Vividly imagining our house torched to the ground by a frantic, roasting kitty, I was surprised to see the breeze around Melvy's speedy bottom blow out his blaze.

My wife and I raced to offer help and comfort. He seemed puzzled by the attention. He never cried. He never screamed. He just burned brightly.

Melvin was (formerly is) blessed with a glorious, bushy, slow-burning tail, which saved him. Quick attention to the tragedy at rear appendage kept the fire from reaching his flesh. Apparently, he never felt pain. It was only a fur wound.

We examined Melvin for damage and brushed away the scorched hair nubs from his smoking wagger.

"No more candles," said Donna.

We learned a life lesson. No more candles.

--With one exception. We had to light a bunch of candles to clear the air of the acrid Fireball Melvin stench.

Blech.

Melvin ambled out to the porch for Squirrel Watch.

Oh. And where's Morty?

Cat photos: Where's Morty?

Morty slept through the entire incident, 10 feet away.

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Fred and Barney: Smokin'


"'The Flintstones' Cast for Winston Cigarettes (Record Player)" via YouTube

It is a bit surprising that I didn't become a smoker. When I was a kid, cigarette ads on television were as commonplace as westerns. I was maybe 10 around the time this commercial for Winston appeared. I shied away from tobacco, although "The Flintstones" was captivating and influential to me.

I never ate a brontosaurus burger either.

I did take a forceful shower under an elephant's trunk. I found the tepid nasal fluids cleansing to be lacking. Subsequently, I was forced to hire and bring in a hedgehog to sneeze on me.

Conditioner.


More: "Bedrock's Smoking" | "Back to Bedrock"

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Wile E. Coyote vs. Road Runner Redux: 'Wiley vs. Rhodes'

A screenshot from To Beep or Not to Beep.Image via Wikipedia
I'm a devotee of Chuck Jones' Road Runner cartoons of 1949-65, so this live-action fan homage / update is of special interest. Nice work.

As a young boy, I was also fascinated by the cartoons' sumptuous art direction, depicting the stories somewhere in the strangest American deserts. Through adult travels around the southwest, I've observed the terrain and concluded Road Runner and Wile E. Coyote reside somewhere in the Utah-Arizona zip codes. The new video was set in Moab, specifically, to my eye, at Arches National Park.

What a wow -- and the perfect location!

See why my wife and I have long considered relocating to Moab, since our first visit in 1995 and as recently as this past spring. At any moment, I may pick up the phone and have ACME ship us on out.




"Wiley Vs. Rhodes" from ApachePictures on Vimeo

via Cartoon Brew

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Thanksgiving Cartoon Carnival


"Jerky Turkey" (Tex Avery, 1945) via YouTube 


Daffy Duck in "Holiday for Drumsticks" (Arthur Davis, 1949) via YouTube 


Tom and Jerry in "The Mouse Comes to Dinner" (William Hanna & Josepth Barbera, 1945) via YouTube

Thanks to GoldenAgeCartoons.com

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Mikellaneous

Follow Mike on Twitter
My Recent Confessions and Observations on Twitter:

Saw America's favorite cowboys, Riders in the Sky, in concert. Afterwards, let's just say, cowgirl yodeling is no longer on my bucket list.

I gave up meat in 1989 and now I'm escalating to the next step. No more "This Little Piggy." I am whee-wheed out.

Headline: "Colin Farrell Front Runner To Star in TOTAL RECALL Remake." Gee, I'm not finished being totally unimpressed with the first one.

Again? I wrongly received the Senior Citizen movie ticket discount without asking for it. I don't know whether to be $3 richer or insulted.

Uh oh. My skinny jeans exploded! Watch out, New Zealand!! Hand me that towel, Donna....

I trimmed the hedges, but my wife didn't look to see my rippled muscles in action. All that muscle rippling for nothing. Nothing.

It's official. Less than one day after my 2nd cataract surgery, I can see 20/20 and my phantasms are RCA recording artists Homer and Jethro.

Eating half off Halloween candy ... Only half the calories...

Item: "Justin Bieber now has his own fragrance line." He seems like an OK chap, but I don't care to smell like McFlurrys & scorched hair.

I'm in a wedding this weekend. It's quite an honor, although I'm not certain of my duties. Something something The Flower Geezer.

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Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Double Feature Puppies: 'Useful Dog Tricks!' and 'Dog Vacation'

Morty at the Movies with Morty the CatMorty's still licking his wounds and nether regions after Tuesday's Animal Kingdom elections. Kitties took a drubbing, losing much of their cutest critters dominance. These negative campaign ads did not help.

Morty, by the way, has deleted all of the dogs off of his TiVo and will be embarking (Morty uses that word with deep sarcasm) on a two-year nap to regroup.

Malign Benign Canines 2012!



"Useful Dog Tricks! Performed by Jesse" via YouTube



"Dog Vacation" via YouTube

Thanks to Frank Thompson and Beth Harris Wilkie

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Meanwhile...

Cat photos: Where's Morty?
Who says kids don't pick up bad habits from television?


Morty's been watching "The Flintstones" and I'm going to talk to him about it, just as soon as someone unlocks the door and I get back inside. DONNA!!!

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Off the Wall

Saving Facebook: My Confessions: 

On the Elections: 

Friend Frank Thompson
Once again, as I've done each year since I got to voting age, I wrote in Ruth Buzzi for every single office. This year it's really gonna happen. I feel it!

Mike
It grieves me to find myself on the opposite end of the political spectrum from you, Frank. I shall continue to write in Tyrone F. Horneigh.

On Identity Theft:

Friend William
Good news - my identity was NOT stolen. Just a sloppy background check service problem.

Mike
Could I steal your identity? I'd really like to be taller.

On the Day After the World Series:

Friend Ray
Can't wait for the World Series to start!

Mike
Can't wait for gum that squirts!

On Television:

Yesterday, on THE JACK BENNY PROGRAM: Guest waitress Iris Adrian takes Don Wilson's order....

IRIS: What about you, Titanic?

DON: Aw, just bring me what I usually have.

IRIS: I can't. The fella who helps me carry it in is off today.

DON: Now, look, Miss, every time I come in here, you make remarks about my size. I'm sure you've seen somebody fatter than me.

IRIS: Yeah. But I had to buy a ticket.

On Nostalgia:

I have reached the point in my life where EVERYTHING is a 50th anniversary and I was there. "Psycho" and "The Bellboy" this summer. Next, the wonderful world of Bedrock, and in January: "One Hundred and One Dalmatians." It was the best time ever to be 8 (I didn't see "Psycho" until 14, but I recall the hoopla). Third grade ruled!

Oh, yeah, "La Dolce Vita." I remember inviting Anita Ekberg to Career Day. She ate my fish sticks in the cafetorium, but "Pollyanna" was more my speed. In those days, I thought of Hayley Mills as leggy.

On the Question:

Friend John
Do you have a fish called Wanda in your aquarium?

Mike
No. I have a cat called Fork.

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Big Weekend

Big weekend, rejoicing I didn't die on the operating table during cataract surgery, because, when the nurse asked what pills I had taken, I chose not to mention the Gas-X.


Also, I Halloweened as Ray Milland, "The Man With the X-ray Eyes."

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Double Feature Puppies: 'The World's Most Stupidest Dog' and 'Baily Beagle Plays Dead'

Morty at the Movies with Morty the CatMy cat Morty is ready to go Halloween hairball-or-treating for bite-size chum and popcorn shrimp. 

One of the ways he gets into the mood is by watching movies of the supernatural -- meaning, dogs. Here are a couple of spooky shows, according to the kit. There's a snarling monster and another about the undead.


"The World's Most Stupidestt Dog" via YouTube


"Baily Beagle Plays Dead" via YouTube

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Mikellaneous

Follow Mike on Twitter
My Recent Confessions and Observations on Twitter:

Bought the trick-or-treat candy today & finished it off within the hour. I am slowing in my old age. Back to the store tomorrow. Mmmm...

I was just informed "Your blog post published successfully!" YESSSS!! Phew! That's 1732 in a row. This streak is getting burdensome.

See what I do here: Looking forward to the eye doctor.

I haven't been inside an airplane since 1974. Is it any wonder? Even these aerial photos make me nervous, but wow!

29 years married & I don't know what I've gotten into. I picked up a bottle in the tub: Vanilla Bean Noel Shimmering Shower Gel. What th--?

My cataract surgery is a success, sez my doc. I'm doing better than most and amazingly I can play the piano. You saps who took lessons, HA!!

Fall is here, which I love 'cause it means I've successfully procrastinated spring cleaning for six months. Six more to go! Fingers crossed!

Rainy day ruins everything. No yard work. ... No washing the car. ... Elphaba failed to show up for brunch....

I'm still shaken by the gigantic spider we found in our bedroom. That monster was HUGE! He had 3 legs in storage! Didn't need 'em! Overkill!

The cataract replacement lens is working great. I've walked into only 6 doorknobs & a pack of large trolls. The growth hormones not so good.

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Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Big Weekend

Big weekend at the bank vault, visiting our upper row safety deposit box. Here is the room as we found it: 


Mice.

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Meanwhile...

Cat photos: Where's Morty?


Morty's watching "Bunnies in Paper Cups," which he finds sadly lacking compared to "Ocean Whitefish and Tuna in Sauce in a Whiskas® Pouch" and "Cod and Shrimp in a Dish With a Kitty Paw Print Drawn on It."

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Big Weekend

Big weekend at a fall festival, subjected to kid beam-girl, belting out heinous songs from "Annie" and then some, and then some more, followed by two and one-half hours of divas-dueling "Dreamgirls."

Big weekend of adenoidal caterwauling!

Big weekend IN HELL!!

Shush.

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Tati Tales

I missed the birthday (Oct. 9) of the French film-maker, writer, and comedian Jacques Tati (1907-1982). He directed only nine pictures, largely sound era silent movies of sorts, but he is considered one of the top masters in cinema circles and internationally beloved for his iconic screen character, the quirky Monsieur Hulot.

I brought some clips.



"Mon Oncle" (1958) via YouTube



"Monsieur Hulot's Holiday" (1953) via YouTube



The postman in "Jour de Fête" (1949) via YouTube


Thanks to Frank Thompson

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Rear Window


The Fabulous Fox Theatre on Atlanta's Peachtree St. 

I took that picture last November, near dawn, driving in to begin my work at the showplace on "Radio City Christmas Spectacular."

Fans of the venue have seen numerous photographs of the famous marquee and building frontage during its 81-year history. I doubt, however, you've caught this next view of the same area, snapped near dusk:


From the Projection Room Potty Portal

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

What the Heck Was I Thinking?

Actual Messages I Wrote, Forgot, Then Found While Cleaning Out My Correspondence Folders 

05/14/09 

I'd like to have those things. We're running low on clutter. 

05/23/09

Watched THE DEVIL AND DANIEL WEBSTER (1941) tonight for the first time. Good and fascinating. I'm told Daniel Webster is related to me, distant cousin or something. He never writes.

06/01/09

On behalf of Cheetos, let me just say, I HATE YOU!!

06/05/09

Beauty. It's the next best thing to Agnes Moorehead on a raft.

06/02/09

The good news is I cleaned out my car. Want some six-year-old Life Savers? Never been opened.

06/03/09

Oh, we don't hate you, Scott. We're grateful to learn this bad news, although I think we're now kaput on Mallowmars.

I rarely eat whole eggs, but do the Eggbeaters thang. I'm down to only a beak or two a month.

Well, I'm feeling ready for a snack. Tonight: cinderblock. Low sodium and stays crunchy in coconut milk. You can also break into the coconut with it.

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Big Weekend

Big weekend, our Wal-Mart got a brand new sign!


I ogled it lovingly, mostly because I can recycle this joke.

Business must be bad. They laid off the hyphen.

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Mikellaneous

Follow Mike on Twitter
My Recent Confessions and Observations on Twitter

I played Hard-Boiled Egg Roulette in my refrigerator today and won! I picked the correct egg. Cracked the shells on Donna's pudding, though.

Steve Martin has joined Twitter. I guess he got, oh oh, Happy Tweet!!! You can use that, Steve. http://twitter.com/STEVEMARTINTOGO

Reading 1970 PEANUTS. The battery has gone out on Snoopy's electric socks. ... *sigh* ... Why wasn't I told of this wondrous invention?

I can tell it has turned cooler. I moved back into my slippers.... I figure by the weekend I'll have to give up the fireflies jar & snorkel.

At #2507, I failed to acknowledge my 2500th tweet. Help yourself to the leftover cake and Beano.

L.A. hits all-time high: 117 degrees. Still not sterile.

Congratulations, Geraldo, celebrating 40 years of moustache nits!

"Sharktopus" is trending on Twitter. Could be a teaching moment. When Sharktopi swallow blood, do they hold out their dainty pinky tentacle?

Actual conversation: My wife informed me the cats are MY children, not hers. I said, "You've had my DNA checked, haven't you?"

Headline: "Man hides stolen earrings in butt." He could face 20 years in prison and "Aw, just keep 'em."

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Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Big Weekend

Big weekend, shopping for sweaters. 


I was hoping for something more periwinkle or argyle.

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Remembering Stoney Curtis

On Sept. 29, actor Tony Curtis died. The following day was the 50th anniversary of the premiere of "The Flintstones." Curtis, as it so happens, is fondly recalled for having voiced his caveman incarnation in a 1965 episode, "The Return of Stoney Curtis."


"The Flintstones: The Return of Stoney Curtis" Excerpts (1965) via YouTube

I'm Mike Durrett, your slave boy.

I've always wanted to say that.

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Back to Bedrock

Fifty years ago this morning, I opened my eyes to a great new old world -- a place called Bedrock. The previous evening, "The Flintstones" debuted on prime time network television and I was there.


"The Flintstones" Show Opening (1960) via YouTube

Fred and Wilma advertising Winston Cigarettes ...Image via Wikipedia
The strange, comical, prehistoric universe of Fred and Wilma and Dino Flintstone, plus their nifty neighbors, Barney and Betty Rubble, was too delicious for this 8-year-old Neanderthal to resist. My friends, too. "The Flintstones" became the first communal obsession of our youth, followed, three months later, by Walt Disney's "One Hundred and One Dalmatians" and, three years down the path, Beatlemania.

What had been intended as TV's first animated sitcom for adults — note the product placement for Winston cigarettes — was hijacked by children. We loved the show and were soon teaching ourselves to doodle the characters' pictures during school. I can draw Fred at the click of a pen or the hammer of a chisel.


"The Flintstones" Winston Cigarettes Commercial and Winston End Credits via YouTube

It wasn't long before producers Bill Hanna and Joe Barbera revamped the concept to pander to kids with the introduction of tot Pebbles (followed quickly by Bamm-Bamm). Great move, boys. The moment that happened — February 2, 10,000 B.C. (We were on tape delay) — the show was altered and ruined forever.

The TV rule of "adding brats to beloved formats doesn't work" was proven once again, or so I told "Lucy" loser Little Ricky.

The chums and I were out of there, moving on to something else, maybe Arithmetic, but probably "The Jetsons."

My first-run "Flintstones" experience was entirely in black-and-white, which was the broadcast norm in 1960. On this page, I've featured the original opening sequence from seasons one and two of the series, plus the end credits for Winston. My memory is the cigarette company was an alternating sponsor, so not prominent each week; therefore, here's a somewhat reworked *generic* closing taken from the color elements.


"The Flintstones" End Sequence (1960) via YouTube

I prefer the early "Flintstones" title sequences. I owned the vinyl record of the superior, jazzy theme, "Rise and Shine," and played the tune incessantly in my bedroom. There were additional musical selections, including the toe-tapping "Split Level Cave."

But, after 48 years of repetitive TV exposure, the updated "Meet the Flintstones" title footage is better known. I like it well enough. With its drive-in theatre imagery, how could I not?


"The Flintstones" Updated Opening via YouTube


"The Flintstones" Updated Closing via YouTube

Eventually, the animation was expanded to include Pebbles and the Rubbles, joining Wilma, Fred, Dino, and the cat on their night out at the movies:


"The Flintstones" Opening With Pebbles and the Rubbles (1964) via YouTube

The closing with the children and Barney and Betty can be seen in this foreign adaptation, although the music track is different than in the U.S. version:


"The Flintstones" Closing With Pebbles and the Rubbles (1964) via YouTube

Now, I must go take a shower. Cue the elephant...

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Remembering Tony Curtis

Operation PetticoatImage via Wikipedia 

One of the quintessential movie stars of my childhood has passed. In addition to being an enjoyable personality, Tony Curtis represented that manly, brilliant handsomeness I sought, but was never able to achieve in design. Few among us could and, anyhow, we probably wouldn't have been able to match his legendary sexual prowess. I'd need salves, lip splints, personal trainers, Wet Naps, Bufferin — I know that.

Tony Curtis was born to play comedy and shared attributes with his hero, Cary Grant, who he so nicely mimicked in the golden farce "Some Like It Hot" (1959) and appeared alongside in the popular pink submarine adventure "Operation Petticoat" (1959).


Tony Curtis, Marilyn Monroe, Jack Lemmon, Joe E. Brown in "Some Like It Hot" via YouTube

Although the studio system and the business dealt Curtis more than his fair quota of dud projects, he always appeared to give them his best. He was a fine dramatic actor, too, when allowed the chance, "Sweet Smell of Success" (1957) being the first choice of these.

My favorite Tony Curtis moment is a single second of face time. It is his introduction in the mammoth road comedy, "The Great Race" (1965), seen in the clip below after the opening title sequence. He's presented, looking straight into the camera, fully in bloom with that bright, dazzling smile. So much so, a flashing twinkle of white light emanates from his teeth. While this bit is obviously animation-enhanced (and has been much copied), it aptly illustrates his screen power, humor, and willingness to laugh at himself.


"The Great Race" Main Title and Tony Curtis via YouTube

Add up all of the screenings and I find I've spent full days of my life in the dark with Tony Curtis, maybe more, and I will continue to revisit the good memories he's left behind to glisten again.

Now, who wants pie?*


Tony Curtis, Jack Lemmon, Natalie Wood in "The Great Race:" via YouTube


*With apologies to Dennis Miller

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

What the Heck Was I Thinking?


Actual Messages I Wrote, Forgot, Then Found While Cleaning Out My Correspondence Folders 

09/10/10 

She was surprised to see you, too. I hear there's lip balm coming. 

06/19/09 

Nice foot.

08/31/10

Heartwarming. Please tell me you didn't send it.

07/09/10

Okay, I've been quiet. I've been patient. I've been waiting for something to be said.

Nothing.

So, don't get mad, but I can stand it no longer. WHAT'S THE DEAL WITH THE POTATO CHIPS?!!

07/06/10

I open next week with my partner, George Burns. My fan dance will kill!!

06/16/10

Love to you and all the mites,

Mike

03/11/10

It would be my pleasure. My penis works weekends as balloon animals.


Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Big Weekend


Big weekend, but no one told me I rock. 

I did get one "You scissors." 

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Cartoon Carnival: Porky Pig's Dueling Do-Dos in Wackyland

An interesting video places the Wackyland sequences from two classic animated cartoons side by side. Wikipedia gives some background....

Bob Clampett's Looney Tunes Porky Pig intro in...    Image via Wikipedia
Hey, it's the weekend! I'm slacking.

"Porky in Wackyland" is a 1938 animated short film, directed by Robert Clampett for Leon Schlesinger Productions as part of Warner Bros.' Looney Tunes series.

In this film, Porky Pig goes hunting through a Salvador Dalí-esque landscape to find the Do-Do Bird for a very large bounty. In 1994, it was voted #8 of The 50 Greatest Cartoons of all time by members of the animation field and in 2000 was deemed "culturally significant" by the United States Library of Congress, who has selected the short for preservation in the National Film Registry.

Furthermore:

A color remake of "Porky in Wackyland" was supervised by Friz Freleng in 1948. Re-titled as "Dough for the Do-Do," the remake was released in 1949. The films were nearly identical, in many cases appearing to match frame-by-frame in certain details, albeit with Porky's appearance updated and the voices having evolved, and many of the backgrounds being different.

Here is the comparison video, followed by the original cartoons in their appropriate Wackylands.




"Porky in Wackyland X Dough for the Do-Do" via YouTube


"Porky in Wackyland" (1938, Robert Clampett) via Revver


"Dough for the Do-Do" (1949, Friz Freleng) via Revver

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Incomings

Actual Letters to Mike Durrett
A radio legend and mukluk putterer, Bob Walker of My 93-1, Hutchinson, Kansas, writes:

Hey Mike,

We had a baby born in the parking lot at the Kansas State Fair. I asked callers for Fair Baby Names. I got Freakshow Fannie, Funnel Cake Jake, Himalaya Micayla, Cotton Candy Sandy.

Do you possibly actually have additional names?????

Soitenly:

Little Bo Geek
Deep Fried Yahoo
Three Car Monty
Drooling Banjo
Tater Tot
Baby Bearded Fat Lady
Free Balloons for the Kid
Live Skunk in the Middle of the Road
Gravel Gertie
Don't Tread on Meatloaf
Tilt-a-Merle
Parking Lotta
Fairy (At Least I'm Not Wal-Mark)

A radio legend and mukluk putterer, Bob Walker of My 93-1, Hutchinson, Kansas, writes:

(Nah! It couldn't possibly be the same one.)

Bob shares New Fall TV Shows That Probably Aren't Going to Make It, including "America's Got a Cold" and "How I Met Your Plumber."

He adds:

I bet you have more spewing from your gizzards.

Oh, a few:

"Survivor: Tainted Food Court Meat Samples on a Toothpick"
"Leave It to Bieber"
"Pimp My Aunt Bea"
"Wincing With the Slurs"
"Family Gut"

And, finally, a radio legend and mukluk putterer, Bob Walker of My 93-1, Hutchinson, Kansas, writes:

(Huh? Who? Huh? What?)

Anyway, he wants to know if I have Telltale Signs the Mosquitoes Are Bad.

Indeed:

They have a tattoo of you with a clot.

They get their stingers pierced.

Just before hitting your blister, you hear teensy voices holler, 'HOT TUB!!" ... And, "Come on in, the sucking's fine!"

They refer to you as Skeeter Cola.

Li'l surfboards wash up in your nose bleed.

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Double Feature Kitties: 'Cat Roulette' and 'Kitten Freaks Himself Out'

Morty at the Movies with Morty the CatWith the fall TV season underway, Morty is fancying himself as the feline Tom Bergeron, hosting videos on my computer with the occasional wise-meow and a casual pullover sweater. 

Here are his latest clips for "America's Funniest Home Kitty-Os," and then he needs to go clean his room.




"Cat Roulette" via YouTube



"Kitten Freaks Himself Out" via YouTube&

Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Mikellaneous

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My Recent Confessions and Observations on Twitter

Jamie Lee Curtis is in my kitchen, eating yogurt. What is that woman doing here? When is she going to leave? Sheesh. I've got things to do..

I appreciate how BURN NOTICE gives detailed instructions on how to be a spy. I'm rethinking the cape.

Ugh. I hate the 3rd Sat. in Sept. It's the day in my Cartoon Clubhouse when I have to climb up to the 26th floor with the new falling anvil.

The Love Police make me nervous with the fur cuffs and the cruiser siren wailing STOP IN THE NAME OF OFFICER FRISKY.

I walked by the television as the announcer said, "EZ Cracker." I yelled back, "Up yours, Smurf!"

@WH2H_Radio - Thank you for the nice words! I am humbled! I am standing proud! --Uh, drat. I am with open fly. I am blushing. I am moronic..

Headline: "New records set at Bog Snorkelling Championships" Oh, thank Heaven! I was hoping! Phew. Sleepless nights...

Making a Smoothie for my cat. Whitefish and crab. In a saucer. Pounce sprinkles on top. Little Topo Gigio with umbrella...

Headline: "Dog eats 12 large bras, sick for 3 months." That's 168 in dog breasts or something I could say about Tiger Woods.

Hey, we guys don't want to taste Activia, Jamie. Have a donut. Get out of my house. Go watch CHRISTMAS WITH THE KRANKS. Go!

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