Another Milestone

Today, I am an hombre.

Big Weekend

Big weekend, helping out.

I like to go in here and shout things like, "Price check, Aisle 6!" or "How many of these can you get for five bucks?"

Chewed for Thought

Apparently, the Bible fails to address chomping an entire pack of Juicy Fruit.

Off the Wall

Saving Facebook: My Confessions: 

On the Question, "Do you think Mike Durrett believes in The Tooth Fairy?"

I do most certainly believe in The Tooth Fairy, the cheap %@#!*.

On My High School Reunion:

Friend Gary
I'm planning on attending. That's fair warning.

Mike
Excellent, Gary. It's been 44 years since we sat together alphabetically. I'll finally get to catch up with the back of your head.

On Dealing With Zombies:

I'm not up on the topic. The only ongoing zombie experience I have is my relentless acquisition of Cheetos.

On an Advertisement:

Mike
"Thick Yellow Nail Fungus" is advertising on my Facebook page, but can I become a fan? No, there is no option for that. I guess I am not good enough. I'm going to be quiet the rest of this evening. I'm deflated. I'll be over there....

Friend Frank Thompson
Can you really become a fan of thick yellow nail fungus? An admirer, certainly, but a fan?

Mike
Oh, I could. I am very loyal.

On the Question, "Do you think Mike Durrett is fast?"

Fast? I have to take a four-hour nap and a Slurpee to get up to sluggish.

Big Weekend

Big weekend, taking it all back.

I didn't realize you had to be so technically inclined and willing to learn new tricks to work at Walmart.

Cartoon Carnival

Mr. Magoo in "When Magoo Flew" (1954, Pete Burness) via YouTube


Popeye the Sailor in "Hello How Am I" (1939, Dave Fleischer) via YouTube


Sam Sheepdog and Ralph Wolf in "Sheep Ahoy" (1954, Chuck Jones) via YouTube

Mikellaneous

My Recent Confessions and Observations on Twitter, Where Everything Must Be Said in 140 Characters or Less

20th Century-Fox firms up PLANET OF THE APES prequel: PLANET OF THE MONKEYS IN THE BELLBOY SUITS.

Volkswagen is using music from Alfred Hitchcock's THE TROUBLE WITH HARRY (1955) in a TV commercial. Are we to expect a body under the hood?

On the first Earth Day in 1970, we were GUARANTEED to be extinct within 10 years! ... Not a thing like Global Warming...

I just saw a fire-snorting goat on TV. I think I may take up drinking....

Playboy is publishing a 3-D centerfold. Sounds kinda skimpy on the bosom to me.

News: "Father of the Trampoline Dead at 96." Services will be held as soon as he comes down ... comes down ... comes down ... comes down...

News: "Father of the Trampoline" funeral continues. He keeps popping up from the hole....

Poison frontman Bret Michaels released from hospital. Bandanaectomy a success!

More on recently found movie footage of Abraham Lincoln... Historians infatuated with back-up dancers dressing in his hat.

Watched: 500 DAYS OF SUMMER. Unrequited love. Been there. Done that. Been there. Done that. Been there. Done that. Ahhhhhhhhhhh, good times.

Follow Me on Twitter
^{Twitter Birds by SpoonGraphics}

I Got Nuthin'

Consolation Video: "Dog Surrogate to Kittens" via YouTube

Big Weekend

Big weekend, not drawing attention to the pinkie ring.

Continued From: "Big Weekend" and "Big Weekend"

My Mom Always Said

MY MOM ALWAYS SAID, "It's a Nice Night Out for Your Salt Lick. Remember to Wipe Your Hooves."

Continued From: "My Mom Always Said" #1 | "My Mom Always Said" #2
More My Mom: "Mom Rules!" via About.com

My Mom Always Said

MY MOM ALWAYS SAID, "The Best Meals Are Quiet Meals. Michael, Isn't Your Mother Calling You? ... Oh. Wait."

Continued From: "My Mom Always Said" #1
More My Mom: "Mom Rules!" via About.com

My Mom Always Said

MY MOM ALWAYS SAID, "Get Your Toes Out of the Gravy Bowl. Boys, No Wading Until 30 Minutes After Dinner."

More My Mom: "Mom Rules!" via About.com

It's No Pants Day!

Mike, Previously: It's No Pants Day 2008 | No Pants Day 2004 via About.com
Funny Site of the Day: No Pants Day

The Four Durretts in 'Star Wars: The Empire Strikes Back'

"Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back" came out 30 years ago, so I remade it. That old school 20th century stuff couldn't possibly be any good.

That's me as Luke Skywalker, my clones Connie and Lester as Han Solo and Princess Leia, and My Inner Demon, Chip, as Lando Calrissian.

I know what you are thinking. Has Lester ever been lovelier?

Watch and Bask:

The Four Durretts in "Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back" via JibJab

I Got Nuthin'

Consolation Video: "'Singin' in the Rain': Guinness World Record Umbrella Dance" via YouTube

Big Weekend

Big weekend, JAZZ HANDS!!

Continued From: "Big Weekend"

This Would Be About My Speed

One of my earliest idols was none other than classic American commercial icon Speedy Alka-Seltzer. At age 3 or 4, spotting this animated lad on the television of the 1950s was truly magical.

Now, in a surprising find via BookSteve's Library, Master Alka-Seltzer is seen teamed with one of grown-up me's favorites, silent movie god Buster Keaton.

Enjoy these nostalgic ads, then go stuff yourself silly, because you'll know what to do. Right, Speedy?


"Buster Keaton Alka-Seltzer Advertisements" via Dailymotion