I am often asked -- well, once -- "What are the secrets to your long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, long, lon--"
"That's enough. Stop it."
"Sorry, Mike. What are the secrets to your marriage?"
"Thanks for asking. Triscuit?"
"No, thank you," said the young man.
"We've got silly cheddar in a can."
"Pass."
"Fine. Here's a tip for you. Follow me to my bathroom."
"Huh? What?" said the inquisitive young man.
"In here. Get in here with yourself. Over the sink."
"Employees Must Wash Hands," he read aloud.
"Yes, the sign. Donna's wedding present to me. It helps me remember. I have to meet code."
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