Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL
Gifts Senior Moment Santa Forgot to Bring Me: Über Macho Chest Rug
I had so been wanting to downplay my voluptuously virile chest thatch.
Tucking myself under this portable thinning-out gift would have been less intimidating to the locals and have insured fewer stray hairs to waft through the IHOP.
I can't pay for everyone's Rooty Tooty Fresh 'N Fruities.