Maybe it's my background in the theatre business, but when I see brightly lit signs boasting "GRAND OPENING BANANAS" or "GRAND OPENING RIBEYE STEAKS," stop right there. I'm in and expecting quite a show. I'm expecting celebrities.
I went into that store to be tickled and enthralled by guys and dolls in ostentatious banana suits and magnificent ribeye steak suits.
Or, at least, a Carmen Miranda tribute band. Something.
Sadly, I was disappointed.
Perhaps, I had read the signs wrong.
I went straight to the produce department. The bananas opened the standard way. There was no new haughty method to enter the bananas I could determine.
Well, based on a half dozen attempts, there wasn't.
Then, up the aisle to the meat morgue. I saw not one ribeye steak with a spectacular gaping maw.
The phrase "grand opening" is tossed around frivolously these days or so it seems. What has happened to our culture?
Continued: "Chomp and Circumstance"
