Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

100 Things About Me

#8

It's Hammer Time!
Photo: Fancy Nails store

I like to go in here and say...
"Yes, let me have a pound of the Fine Cut Headless Brads and your best wine. Nothing French! That's for bourgeois Pantry Netting Staples. --Oh, and give me the Cement Coated Sinker Nails with fur trim. Do you have Cummerbund Tacks?"

Before the clerk gets in a word, I continue...
"I realize this is Fancy Nails, but would you know whether suede loafers or patent leather lace-ups go best with toggle bolts? What about Bronze Boat Nail Yacht Spats? Tell you what, I'll hop on over to Fancy Drywall Screws or Fancy Hot Dipped Ring Shank Nails and ask them. Thanks, doll!"

Then, I leave.

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