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My Recent Confessions and Observations on Twitter, Where Everything Must Be Said in 140 Characters or Less

I've been taking a bit of a Twitter vacation. My Inner Dialogue told me to get the hell out, so I'm back. How you doin'?

I'm off to a high school reunion. I didn't go to the school. I don't know those people. I CRAVE to talk Algebra. Since it's never come up.

Actually, I am going to my high school reunion today. Eight hours of people asking me if they can have my fish sticks.

2:59 a.m. I'm finally home, having survived my high school reunion. I had to stay after for Study Hall and to clap the chalk erasers.

I would've asked classmates to sign my yearbook at the school reunion, but we grew up in the '60s & aren't allowed to trust anyone over 30.

Due to unprecedented demand, my 1st video debuts tom'w. Tho, "unprecedented demand" could mean a cat w/hiccups. And it do.

Today, June 4, is Hug Your Cat Day. Consider that done. Morty loves a big Daddy hug. ... Anyone seen my wallet?...

Cost-cutting everywhere... The strings on this banana are twine.

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