Mike Durrett: CONFIDENTIAL

Even More Exceedingly Erratic Bad News

First, my cat dies and the Weedwacker works and the air is let out of my chef's hat and Popeye's bye-bye and a turban's AWOL.

Now, I can't bring back Donna's Turbie Twist. She's fit to be tied.

I phoned my florist to brighten the day.

They're closed.

I called my florettes and got an arrangement of Broccoli Wokly.

Unfortunately -- and this makes me steam -- there is no "microwave in bag."

My luck, they leave out the prize.
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