Creator Says, 'Hey!'

And the Lord said, "Apostrophe. Maybe some quotation marks, and, I thinketh, one of those li'l dot jobs on the end."

Courage: 1532, 'Mommy': 2009

MARIETTA, GA -- We saw Theatre in the Square's "gripping recounting of Sir Thomas More’s moral struggle to obey his conscience," "A Man for All Seasons."

This exemplary, unwavering gentleman proved without a trace of uncertainty that I am, by comparison, "A Man for Only About an Hour or Two on Occasional August 19ths if There's a Nice Breeze and the Relative Humidity Falls Well Under 35% and There Is No Hulking Meany Burpin' Tuna Fish Fumes Into My Nose While Thumb-Twisting My Earlobes for My Lunch Money and I Remembered to Stock a Goodly Supply of Bactine and a Band-Aid With a Hello Kitty on It and the Light Is Left On So I Can See When I Come Out From Under the Covers and, First, I'll Need a Drink of Water and a Snack Pudding: Chocolate."

In Color.

Egg Shaped Chalk

Wow! Seeing these brought back the memories.

Mike: Mommy! Can I? Can I?!

Mother: Michael, no. I am not buying those. You do not need them. We've got kidney stones at home.

More Madvertising

Continued From: "Madvertising"

The Google Adsense computers, which select many of the advertisements on this blog, work in miraculous ways. What they do is visit my articles and decide what to publish alongside by carefully analyzing the content.

When I've written about movie theatres, I've seen contextual blurbs for popcorn machines. When I mention my cat, there will often be pet product ads. Those types of placements.

Here's a screen shot taken on St. Patrick's Day:


The featured confession, "One Night Only! The Mike Durrett Dancers!" It was an innocent event, where I performed traditional Irish stepping, backed by some talented local gals, lovely personalities, and my clones, Lester and Connie.

The adjacent ad:


Et tu, Google?

Madvertising

The selection of specific advertisements served to this site by Google are beyond my control. I am as surprised as anyone by the items I see displayed on these pages. Here is a screen shot of yesterday's post:


What is this?


"Boy Dress"?! JC Penney is selling boy dresses?

What is going on, America? Are our children coming out of the catalog?

Sheesh. That's changin' we can bedazzlin'.


And "Solid Black Men" Suits?!!

I guess Wimpy Fo Shizzle White Guys need not inseam measure.

Mikellaneous

My Recent Confessions and Observations on Twitter, Where Everything Must Be Said in 140 Characters or Less

I woke up to my cat meowing that song, "Let's Go Fly a Kite." I gave him the ball of string and he shut up.

News Item: "Woman blames DWI on liqueur chocolates." Well, OK, if we can blame pirating on Jolly Rogers & hiding divorce assets on Cadbury.

I missed an episode of THE OFFICE due to a TiVo mishap, but just made good, watching it online. I wish making up for lost lunch was so easy.

I've taken to watching THE OFFICE while working at my desk. The camaraderie has been a real morale booster for my stapler and gel pens.

News Item: "Banks with a high 'misery index.'" That's absolutely true. The lollipops atop the teller counters suck.

I touched on this in my blog, how seeing half a pie 4 sale disturbs me. It's like buying a sandwich with a bite out of it.

What I luv about Twitter: I just learned @TinaFey is presently eating Famous Amos cookies, while I'm eating grits. We're soul food mates!

News Item: "Baby boy born with two penises." He's got it coming and going.

I found surprising gunk in a coffee mug this morning, causing an epiphany. My country life is decidedly less gunky than in The Big City.

I'm sitting here with my pal Rob, showing him all about Twitter. Rob & I were in the first grade together, back when we tottered & tittered.

My wife has put her foot down. She will not let me become a teenage mom. I never have no fun.

News Item: "Jail considers making inmates pay for toilet paper." Currently, crime doesn't pay.

...Please don't squeeze the warden.

Reading a claim: "Eighty percent of married men cheat in America." I am such a slacker. I should try to do worse.

News Item: "Star Trek Cologne Boldly Smells Like Nothing Has Smelled Before." I hope that means it doesn't smell like Shat.

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I Got Nuthin'

_{"Extreme Sheepherding" via YouTube}

100 Things About Me #168

Birthday Boy Debut

Today is the anniversary of my arrival on your planet, popping out with an introductory "TA-DA!"

And, amazingly, exactly one year to the day later, my mother arsoned a cake in my honor.

(I'll have you know, I can still squeeze into this chair.)


"Garçon! ... Bosco!"

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