Mikellaneous

My Recent Confessions and Observations on Twitter, Where Everything Must Be Said in 140 Characters or Less

I've got to quit peering into the mirror. I'm not only fat, I'm outside the lines.

I viewed & translated Italy's TOO BAD SHE'S BAD (1954). I speak the universal language. It's called 20-Year-Old Sophia Loren in a Swimsuit.

I had a thought, observing kids at a restaurant. ... What a wonderful thing to be seven again and have all my pizzas in front of me.

I've become aware The Stupid Institute is following me on Twitter. I'm both humbled and paranoid I'm a research project.

I'm looking for a new sleep apnea breathing machine with a back-up battery. It needs to snore for me, too.

I'm boycotting the Olympics until they recognize my event: Freestyle Speed Sloth.