Mike vs. King Kong and Mike and Ike

In recent weeks, my wife and I have been exchanging those three little words which make my cuddly heart swell:
"giant monkey movies"
We're in the midst of a boom market for giant monkey movies. Simian cinema is having a resurgence on television and theatre screens worldwide -- and I've caught the wave. I love them.

Mike is startled when King Kong sneaks up behind him.I've been looking forward to "King Kong," so it was ironic I backed into him at the mall (pictured, right).

He scared the bejesus out of me. I dropped my Coke and got what tastes like chimp fur on my Gobstoppers.

I'm still picking it off. (I hate to dip candy in a dipilatory cream.)

I should have bought the Mike and Ike. I've never tasted Mike and Ike, due to my name. I'm always afraid they'd make me feel gay or something.

Neither a Mike nor an Ike has ever touched these pliant, tremulous lips. Nope, I am a married man and my lips are reserved for her cooking.

Maybe if I separated all of the Mikes into one pile and all of the Ikes into another. But, then, I'd have the dilemma, which gent do I eat?

I mean, if I eat Ike, is that, like, socially acceptable? Especially, after singling him out. It's not weird is it?

Those Mikes are admittedly cute, as I would expect, but eating Mike, for me, would be kind of incestuous AND cannibalistic.

On the other hand, I have never been an advocate of wasting a perfectly good Mike.

I only want to be politically correct. Don't make me do bad.

I'm so flustered over Mike and Ike, I refuse to contemplate the implications of sucking Rainbow Nerds.

There I go getting sidetracked. I've used up all of my Kong time. I've got more to write about him. He's a big subject--

OH, HELL! Look at that giant lizard!!

I just noticed that slimy monster in the photo. At the mall, with all the confusion and the clean-up, I saw Kong there, but never--

Great. I knocked over my Coke.

To Be Continued

No comments:

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...